Episode 159 : Today's Episode is brought to you by the word, "Fag". 

Sorry for the "Inappropriate" Title, but after you read this episode, you'll probably understand it ! I have been taking pictures over the past few days, and will throw them all into this episode, it's quite large, so prepare yourself (56k dialups, you may want to go make a sandwhich)

Some Tamer just loves to bring a train of Polar Bears into town to harras the reds that wander through. 
I missed the screenshot, but I polymorphed into a polar bear myself, and was unnoticed stealing a necklace of invisibility 24 charges off him!

Dr. Alonsa Klien is the one yelling for the guards, I was unnoticed in getting a 6 charge teleport ring, and he paid 1,000 gold for its return. 
However, he gated out to someone's house (Adel Lother's house actually!!!) and lost his ring again. 

Sadly, I banked all my regs and had no way to defend myself, and ran from the Wrong Dungeon area all the way to Yew Moongate, to Jhelom...

You think mIchiEl JaCksON will take the bait ?

He did! 

A ring of Teleport 10 charges and necklace 24 charges were stolen unnoticed from a Tamer, "Love Handles"  in town! 
He wasn't quite happy :

Now you see why I named this episode as such ? 
Love Handles thinks he is sneaky, and fetches his dragon, then cast "Incognito" and walks back to the bank ! HA!

His dragon walks too slow however! 

A few hours ago, someone was selling hero-dyed clothing at the bank, all pre-patch. Rand al Thor was inquiring about a bag full 
of pre-patch hero weapons and shields, and lured the seller away from the bank far enough for me to steal a bow and tear shield! 
Well, I thought Rand al Thor was luring him from the bank to do just what I did, steal some - however he REALLY did want to buy the entire bag!
I am at the bank later on, and he asked me to join his party to discuss something....

I was noticed on the shield, but not the bow *snickers*

I told him that I never once robbed him directly, so the goods would remain mine. 
That's when "Hun Battle Gear" walked by and I spyed a Tribal Berry, and I was unnoticed in stealing it as well! 
She was not pleased...


Uncer was not only holding a tribal spear, but standing quite far from the bank. 
The bears could do nothing

Dr Alonso Klien is back, and really doesn't like me now! I steal a key ring off the guy there in hopes they are important keys...

However, it seems negotiations may not go far today... ><

I already targeted Dread Knights 120 silver in his pack. However, he says out loud "Look at what Im holding" and I do...
Now I have his axe targeted, but how will I get it?

He's going hunting! (And his friend is asking if he's sure he wants to bring it! HA!)
It sure doesn't get better than this - his friend opens a gate, and I go first!


I run to Cove to bank it, but Dread Knight is there waiting for me it seems, I run off and help-menu to Britian (again, no regs!)

I'm seriously Perma, and decide to see what this nervous tamer is carrying. 

Oh no, a red has wandered into the area and is getting ready to cook some bear burgers with me!

I finally turn back to normal, but with 5 health and only 17 stamina. I go to the bank to quickly heal up, however 
Dread Knight appears out of nowhere and starts to chase me down - with only 17 stamina, I disarm his new axe once, but I can
no longer run away - so I 'walk' as briskly as I can around him trying to avoid the inevitable death....

He says the classic lines of "I don't care, I have more" but goes on to say "besides, it was in serious need of repair"

This little chickadee had a nice necklace on her. I was guardwacked the first time, but not the second! 

Whew, at least I'm no fag. 

The insults are being laid on thick, till she desires to "Thump Me", but then says "I'll leave that to my hubby". Dammit. She thinks I'm a fag afterall. 

Bali in town is holding a Vanquish Axe and going hunting too! I dismiss this woman and go after him...


Mr X just sold a TON of Invisibility items to this guy on foot. I didn't have time to snoop and find a good piece, so I just picked a ring of 12 charges. 

Two Tamers are using their mares at the Jhelom bank to get good loot. However, they are low on spawn, so I lure over 
two Golems and a Bog Thing as a courtesy call! (Notice Groo saying "Hello Jerk")

What's this, Zantilas has a nice sword! However, I didn't see the Jeweler hiding behind the bog thing. 

I return, and Zantilas is dead, so the sword is much easier to get now. 

I've lost count how many times I was called a fag today...

Felonious Monk, a new member in the LBC tells me a house fell on Siege! however, 
nobody can place a new house. I show up to lend a hand, and none other than Adel Lothar is there!
I can't get my small house deeds to place, and I think only a small marble shop will fit, but I must buy some time 
until I can find someone with a deed. Well, there is one 'legal' way to block house placement, and it's very easy to implement ...

Dr Alonso Klien, we meet again!?!
I told him not to worry, all my kids were fed today and I wouldn't be robbing him. 

Adel is doing a fine job blocking house placement with my corpses, however he has become quite ignorant and attacks me on sight. 
Well, I wonder if he's also met my other "Crazy Joe", the Mule ?

Not only did he meet the Mule Crazy Joe, but he gets a gift of a count! 

Notice the mule has a nicer Tan than the thief!

Finally I tell Dr Alonso why I'm letting him kill me - to stall house placement! I finally got ahold of Vix from Tradespot, and she's 
on the way! Vix arrives, however a gate opens and MORE people show up, one saying he knows for a fact a small marble house WAS here first. 
I ask Vix to hand me the deed, and....
I get it on the third try, turns out the house went lower than I thought, but we still got the house! Felonious Monk recieved a 50k Finders Fee, 
while I pinched Vix's butt for payment. (unnoticed too)


It's getting late, and we return to Britian. I find Corran Horn at the bank, but I think he logged out! Time for a wrestle contest, but first I went to clear 
my perma, because someone I looted 15 plants from the day before is attacking me on sight, and learned I'm Perma! 


Looking behind Corran's Heath Bar, you can see Terlis of Ishath casting Flamestrike, and it's for me! He dies quickly quickly!
and Corran Horn times out RIGHT before he dies! Lucky bastard. 

Lincoln also goes to test my Perma Gray status!

If you havent' noticed it yet, I have a very good disguise on....

I was the dog! Too bad dogs run to slow. 

I get asked "Are you the Real Crazy Joe" every day. I normally lie and say no, however today
I was able to say I'm not the Crazy Joe that's a Moderator and thought it would be solved, but someone fixed that loophole ><

While I dig for my Orc Fort Rune, Pola there on the Ostard opens a gate for this guy Scorpion. Well, Pola has an "instant" death rune on Siege!
I went into the gate once, and lived, so for now on when she gates I track and see if she REALLY goes in her gates. This time, she didn't ><

So where's her gate you ask ? Well, one that loves to Loot, I decide to try my luck...

Confused to how I will be able to loot either corpse, Pola runs in from behind and hides, then dismounts her ossy! 
Sadly, the ONLY loot here was a single book on Scorpion's corpse. 


That's it folks!